


Whatever You Want

by exohousewarming, pricklyteeth



Series: oc shenanigans au [1]
Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Fake/Pretend Relationship, M/M, Mutual Pining, OT12 Shenanigans, SOCAL AU, So much flirting, abusive ex mention, cute cross cultural tings, eating disorder mention
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-15
Updated: 2017-10-15
Packaged: 2019-01-17 17:25:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,619
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12370479
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/exohousewarming/pseuds/exohousewarming, https://archiveofourown.org/users/pricklyteeth/pseuds/pricklyteeth
Summary: Baekhyun's parents are coming to visit him for two weeks and he's excited, as he should be. Except he forgot he never told his parents he'd stopped seeing his ex, and they expect him. Never one to disappoint his family, he needs a boyfriend fast.Luckily his roommate, best friend and resident angel of Baekhyun's life, Yixing, is willing to play boyfriend.





	Whatever You Want

**Author's Note:**

> **Author Note:** hello, hello! this fic was a big struggle for me, and I'm not as confident about it as I was when I first started it, but I think that might just be writing pains. in any case, i hope you enjoy!

It begins with a phone call, as things sometimes do in bizarre circumstances that Baekhyun finds himself in. Only, he’s not being broken up with (this time) or being told someone he’s in love with got engaged (to his knowledge) or one of his parents have passed (he’s talking to both of them now).  
  
They’ve decided to come down and visit him, which is peachy! It’s great, it really is. Baekhyun loves his parents, and is really lucky to have them, only:  
  
“Oh yes, our puppy! Will we finally get to meet him?”  
  
_Him._ Baekhyun’s ex, who he has not yet replaced, nor told his parents he’s broken up with. Instead of telling the truth, Baekhyun does what he does best. He lies.  
  
“Oh! Him!” His eyes flick up and he sees Yixing wiping crumbs from his egg tart off of his mouth, frowning at his sheet music before crossing something out, profile haloed in the afternoon sunlight.  
  
_Yixing._ Yixing, his angel of a roommate, who could impress anyone’s parents, and would make anyone proud to call him theirs. “Yeah, Yixing would love to meet you! He and abeoji can play together.”  
  
His mother chuckles lightly on the other end, a pretty tinkling sound. Sometimes he wishes his laugh was as pretty as his mom’s. Unfortunately, it’s like the rest of him, too much and too loud. At least it fills a room. “Alright, Baekhyun-ah. We’ll be glad to meet him then.”  
  
“Mm, I’ll-” Yixing starts gently plucking at his guitar, trying to figure something out. _No._  
  
“Oh, is that him? Is he there right now?”  
  
“Ah, haha, he’s actually my roommate, so he’s kind of always here.”  
  
“Oh, it’s very serious, huh?”  
  
“Well, I wouldn’t say- ”  
  
“Let me talk to him, puppy.”  
  
_What has he Done._  
  
Baekhyun clutches his phone to his chest, shuffling over to where Yixing is playing, only making him break his focus when he’s directly in front of him. If he wasn’t panicking, mondo, he might have taken the time to appreciate how cute it is that Yixing gets into this focusing bubble when he’s working on music.  
  
However, he has dug himself into a little bit of a hole, and he can’t spare thoughts on anything but his possible doom (mom catching him in a lie, never trusting him ever again).  
  
“It’s my mom,” he hisses, “be nothing but vague and charming. I’ll explain later.”  
  
Yixing looks at him blankly, nodding. Baekhyun can always count on him, bless. He puts his phone on speaker.  
  
“Hello Mama Byun, how are you!” Yixing chirps. An angel. What did Baekhyun do in his past life to deserve such a pure and perfect roomie.  
  
“Hello Yixing, I heard you’ve moved in with Baekhyunnie now?”  
  
“Haha, yes, we’ve-” Baekhyun abruptly shakes his head. “I have!”  
  
“Baekhyun never told us! I wish we’d had more updates—you know he always likes to keep secrets.”  
  
Yixing laughs, mostly because he sees the resemblance. Baekhyun and his mom are both chatty and have a really familiar humor about them; there’s something like an immediate closeness that they foster when they talk to you. “I’m sure it’s because he’s been busy and it slipped his mind.”  
  
Baekhyun’s mother tsks on the other end of the line. “Forget to tell your mother that your boyfriend moved in? Come on now, Yixing, would you have forgotten?”  
  
Yixing can feel his ears flush, and he looks up at Baekhyun, because—what?  
  
Baekhyun just nods frantically at him, gesturing to keep going.  
  
“Ah…Well, I guess I can’t excuse him for that one—I mean, I’ve told my ma…”  
  
Baekhyun’s mom puts on an exasperated sigh, although he can tell she doesn’t mean it. “See, even your ma knows!”  
  
She pauses to whisper in rapid-fire Korean to someone, probably Baekhyun’s dad. “Anyway, we’re coming over for two weeks this coming weekend, okay? I’m sure Baekhyun will tell you all about it. Until then, take care of Baekhyunnie for us!”  
  
“Yes, will do…”  
  
Yixing looks confused and Baekhyun reaches over to squeeze his knee apologetically before returning the phone to his ear to end the call.  
  
“Yes, yes Eomma. See you then. Abeoji, I’ll call again later—skype? Can you still skype? Mm. Bye, see you soon.”  
  
He lets out a sigh after the call ends, before dropping to his knees in front of his roommate. “Yixing, Yixing don’t hate me, but you’re going to have to play my boyfriend.”  
  
Yixing sets his pencil behind his ear to pat at Baekhyun's hands gripping his knees as he grovels.  
  
“I’m not—I’m really not mad, just. Confused? Like? Why would you have to have a boyfriend just to see your parents?”  
  
“I haven’t told my mom I got broken up with because I didn’t want to feel like a giant loser, and when she asked I just—panicked? I just, I wouldn’t stop gushing about him before, and she seemed so _happy_ -”  
  
Yixing tries not to grimace because he hated Baekhyun’s ex. He was a flaming heap of garbage. “And she never asked what his name was?”  
  
“Well, I told her I didn’t know how long it would last, and I didn’t want her to think it was super serious yet, so-”  
  
“So you told her _my name_ , because we’re So Serious we live together?” Yixing tries to keep the hurt out and just keep his tone incredulous, because Baekhyun doesn’t need to know, and this would just make everything even more complicated.  
  
“Well, if you didn’t want to do it, we could have figured something else out-” and Baekhyun is panicking again because, he never really gave Yixing a choice, did he?  
  
“Look, it’s fine, it’s done. It’ll be two weeks. I can play boyfriend, whatever, you know? I just-” He lifts his hand from Baekhyun’s to pinch at his cheek. “wish you thought that through a little bit. The truth wouldn’t have killed her, you know.”  
  
It wouldn’t have, but Baekhyun has always been terrible at it. The Truth.

 

\--

 

His parents are coming today, and Baekhyun shouldn't be a major panicky mess, but he is. He really is, and he's not sure if he can do this. It's two entire fucking weeks of straight up lying.

  
He's arranging flowers in a vase so their apartment seems less gross and like they nest in it instead of just live here. He's spent the past few days tidying up, and Yixing has been more than helpful, not only cleaning out his space and his things, but devoting himself to making the whole place look cleaner and brighter.  
  
Not that they're both absolute messes, but this place definitely looks a lot more like a place where people in the honeymoon phase might live. It feels a little more domestic and cared for, rather than just the place where they happen to spend their time and dump all their stuff in.  
  
Yixing's been setting up the inflatable mattress in the living room, and Baekhyun’s just moving to put away the dishes when the sound of the electric pump stops.  
  
"Are you done already?" Baekhyun calls out, wondering, because that was fast.  
  
Yixing's coming into the kitchen, looking a little panicked himself. "Why are we making your parents sleep on the floor?"  
  
Baekhyun frowns. "We don't have an extra bed for them, or a guest room, duh?"  
  
Yixing lets out a breath, as if he knows something Baekhyun should know already. "If we're supposed to be dating, what do we have separate rooms for?"  
  
Baekhyun's heart starts beating faster, starting to panic more at the amount of work they have to do before his parents get here. "Fuck, fuck, you're right, you're right. Do we just? Empty my room and move my shit to yours?"  
  
Yixing nods, expression grave. This is stressful for the both of them. "I'll just fold the inflatable mattress up and I'll be over to help you."  
  
Baekhyun doesn't know how he'd do any of this without Yixing, but he doesn't have time to feel guilty about it for long, because he has to haul ass and get his room empty and looking like no one lives there on top of changing and fixing his face in less than two hours.  
  
He lets out a whine when he opens the door to his room, feeling the anxiety multiply at how insurmountable the task of emptying out his room feels. His shit is everywhere, and there’s just, so much of it.  
  
How is anything going to fit in Yixing’s room? Why did he do this to himself? Why did he have to fucking lie?  
  
Baekhyun just face plants on his bed to groan at how much he clearly hates himself when Yixing comes in, laying next to him to squeeze at his waist.  
  
“Come on, you giant baby. We got this. Just put on some movie montage music and it’ll be done in no time.”  
  
Baekhyun rolls over onto his back to face Yixing, not even surprised at how close Yixing is to his face. He’s never had a particularly good sense of personal space, but neither has Baekhyun. It’s one of the many reasons they’re such great roomies. They just work.  
  
“Can we start our montage playlist with Queen’s Don’t Stop Me Now?” Baekhyun asks in a small voice.  
  
Yixing smiles. “You betcha.”  
  
The music helps a lot. He mostly just had to dump his things into laundry baskets and empty boxes, and Yixing either found places for them in his room or consolidates stuff that Baekhyun won’t be needing into boxes under his bed.  
  
In no time, they’re changing out Baekhyun’s sheets with new ones, lipsynching to the lyrics of Europe’s The Final Countdown, replete with headbanging and (mostly Baekhyun) stepping on and toppling over his computer chair to air guitar solo.  
  
Yixing’s rearranging and fluffing the pillows when Baekhyun comes in to set a flower vase on the bedside table, flopping back onto his (now upright) computer chair.  
  
“I think we did alright, don’t you think?”  
  
Yixing smiles, looking around the room. “Well, it definitely doesn’t look like you live in here anymore.”  
  
Baekhyun kicks his leg out, too far to reach Yixing. “Hey, you’re supposed to be nice to me. Boyfriends are _nice_. Pretend to be in love better.”  
  
Yixing looks away before he’s throwing a pillow at Baekhyun’s face.  
  
“Hey!”  
  
“A soft pillow, for my sweet.”  
  
“Shut the fuck up Zhang.”  
  
  
  
  
“I don’t know why you have to put on makeup for, you look good without it-”  
  
Baekhyun’s about to snap about how Yixing doesn’t understand but he’s caught a little off guard when he turns around. Yixing’s in a nice fitted sweater and clean jeans and his hair is washed and combed and styled away from his face and wow? Yixing cleans up nice. Not that Yixing hasn’t always been a cutie, but the struggling singer-songwriter that pays rent mostly by being a harried barista look was, well, a little scruffy to be honest.  
  
“What,” Yixing asks, fingers reaching up to push his hair back, looking a little self conscious.  
  
“Nothing, you look great. Just c’mere, let me fill in your brows.”  
  
Yixing tries to get away, but Baekhyun wrestles him to the ground, sitting on him while he lightly fills them in, holding his jaw so he won’t move and fuck up his work.  
  
“You know, you have a really pretty brow shape, you should fill them in more often, your face has so much definition-”  
  
Baekhyun’s phone rings from the counter and he screams, scrabbling up to answer it, hopping off of Yixing to finish the rest of his makeup (it’s not a very involved look today, but he’s not _done)._  
  
“Yeobosey- mom! Mm, you’re here? Parking? Okay, I told him where- parking spot 1485, I texted! One-four-eight-five, il-sa-pal-eo, okay? Found it? Okay, we’re coming down, one second.”  
  
He finishes blending his foundation down his neck, before turning to Yixing, who’s starting to look more panicky than he is.  
  
Baekhyun just grabs his face and pulls him down to his level. “Do I look okay?”  
  
Yixing nods blankly.  
  
“Then that’s all that matters. We’re doing this right?”  
  
Yixing nods again.  
  
“Then we got this.” Baekhyun smiles, letting go of his face to grab his hand, pulling him out the door.

\--

  
Yixing isn’t so sure about this, but Baekhyun’s hand is in his, and he figures it can’t be all bad.  
  
They’re taking off down the hallway, and down the stairs (they’re only on the second floor) to the parking lot beside their apartment complex, spotting Baekhyun’s parents coming out of their car.  
  
_Here we go_ , he thinks to himself. He knows this is just for show, just for two weeks, but he really wants to impress Baekhyun’s parents. He wants them to like him.  
  
“Annyeonghaseyo, Eommoni, Abeoji,” Yixing greets, bowing.  
  
“Ahh! So polite, Baekhyun did you teach him?” Baekhyun’s mother exclaims, his father bowing back and smiling warmly. Yixing can see the resemblance. They both seem so warm and bright.  
  
Baekhyun is a little taken aback, blinking at Yixing. “Ah, no, no I didn’t. I think Yixing learned that on his own.”  
  
Yixing just smiles sheepishly. “Sorry if my pronunciation is off, I just wanted to greet you properly!”  
  
“Oh my, such a polite boy. Our puppy did so well, huh?” Baekhyun’s mother preens, looking over at her husband.  
  
“Mm, it would seem so,” his father answers good naturedly.  
  
“Mind if we take your bags?” Yixing’s already reaching for them, not wanting them to hold onto them while they were talking; they looked heavy. “We’ve got a dinner reservation to catch, which, no rush at all, but we figured we might go out to eat instead of subjecting you both to our cooking, at least on the first night.”  
  
“Oh, I’m sure your cooking would have been just fine,” Baekhyun's mother assures with a smile. She gives Baekhyun a look over Yixing’s shoulder as he takes their bags, imparting approval and how impressed she is. Yixing feels like he’s glowing, a little.  
  
It was going to be two trips, but Yixing makes it in one, piling duffel bags under his arms. Baekhyun’s mom, like her son, is apparently a heavy packer, which is endearing more than anything else.  
  
Yixing just hopes he can maintain the impression they have of him for the rest of their stay.

  
  
  
“Oh my, this place seems so popular,” Baekhyun’s mom comments, as they park. The line is out the door, wrapping around the building.  
  
“And that’s why we got reservations, Eomma. Wouldn’t want to make you and dad wait. This place is probably worth it, but we all know how impatient he gets when he’s hungry.” Baekhyun hums, eyes flicking over to his father, who’s also wearing a playful expression.  
  
“Tch, and this kid wonders why we didn’t have anymore kids after him.” he says playfully.  
  
Baekhyun huffs, putting on an indignant expression. “I was just being considerate of your testy personality, no need to bring up my desire for other siblings born out of my sad and lonely childhood.”  
  
“Hah! I’ll let Beom know you resent him in the groupchat!” Baekhyun’s father shoots back, typing out a message with his index finger. The telltale kakaotalk ringtone sounds shortly, and he looks up with a smile. “Beom said his feelings are hurt, he demands compensation for dragging you to all of his playdates as a child, and he wants to know why he wasn’t invited.”  
  
Baekhyun tsks, reaching over to unbuckle Yixing’s seatbelt for him, amused at how he’s just watching their exchange. “Tell hyung he’s invited anytime he wants to pay for his plane ticket down from Norcal.”  
  
Yixing blinks over at him, not trying to look surprised at the affectionate gesture—Baekhyun is notoriously awful at respecting personal space boundaries, not that Yixing is any better, but this is a little different than just being friendly. "Oh, that's right, I've never met your brother."  
  
"Really?" Baekhyun asks. "I'm sure you've probably seen him on skype or something. But don't worry," Baekhyun says, as they're getting out of the car, calling over the top. "You're not missing too much babe."  
  
Yixing bites down on the inside of his lip, feeling fortunate that Baekhyun can't see how his expression slips from his side of the car. Baekhyun calling him babe fed the ever growing ever present crush Yixing's always nursed for him, but the fact that he was just doing it to keep appearances with his parents felt so artificial, so  _painful._

\--

  
They get seated pretty quickly, much to the chagrin of everyone waiting in line. They're sitting in a cushy booth towards the back of the restaurant, quiet enough to hear each other talking without having to yell, but in an optimal spot for people watching and appreciating the interesting modern Chinese decor. Baekhyun loves this place; it's not their only haunt by any means, they have a couple different spots they frequent, especially when they're hanging out with friends, but it's comfy and nice and the dumplings are fucking bomb.  
  
Luhan and Tao had introduced him awhile back, insisting that the dumplings are _different_ than the ones he's accustomed to, and they were right. He was hooked. He actually hasn't been for a while, and the fact that they had an excuse to go made Baekhyun a little more excited than he should be, especially given the fact that he also had to fake date his roommate for this occasion. Although, if Baekhyun had to pretend to be in a relationship with anyone, Yixing was probably his best bet. He's charming, talented, funny, sweet, super considerate, hot. He's kind of the entire boyfriend package, now that Baekhyun was thinking about it.  
  
He's watching as Yixing explains the different kinds of dumplings to his parents as they point to various entries in the menu, and it doesn't occur to him that he's staring until his mom is asking him a question.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Oh, my lovesick puppy, I was asking what you like. Yixing was explaining the... tāng?"  
  
"Yes," Yixing says encouragingly, "Baekhyun likes xiǎo lóng bāo—" he cuts himself off to rephrase for Baekhyun. "You know, your twisty soup bombs. 'Tāng bāo' is the generic name for any of the steamed soup dumplings, so you were right, it's a kind of tāng bāo."  
  
"Those seem really interesting, we've got to try some of those. It's so hard to choose, everything on the menu looks so delicious!"  
  
Baekhyun smiles. He knew his parents would like it here. "That's because everything on the menu is delicious, Eomma."  
  
She tsks at him. "You come here enough times to know what everything on the menu tastes like and you still don't recognize the name of your favorite dish? I didn't raise my son to be this ignorant, tch."  
  
His father lifts his head from the menu to level a disapproving look across the the table at him. "She's right you know. You didn't teach Yixing how to greet us and he knew. I see one of you at least knows how to respect your partner's culture."  
  
Baekhyun flusters, but looking over to Yixing doesn't help. He's just trying to bite back a smile. Traitor. "Well-"  
  
"Well, you're right Appa, I should probably do better about learning Chinese, not only because it will make me seem less like an American brat, but also because my partner is Chinese, and it would probably be a good idea," his father mimes, speaking in a higher pitch to mock him.  
  
He huffs, giving up with a put on pout. "You're right, you're right."  
  
Yixing squeezes his thigh reassuringly before lifting a hand to flag down waitstaff. It's nice, even though he knows his parents aren't really trying to reprimand him. But it's true, he really could have just learned what it was called.  
  
Yixing is getting all their orders for them, switching back to English to confirm what they want, and to translate back what the waiter is saying: Two waters? Warm or Hot? Black iced tea, right Baek?  
  
Baekhyun's not really sure what it is. Luhan and Tao have both ordered for him before, and he's sure Yixing has ordered for him before too, but something about his focus, and how good he is at taking care of his family makes Baekhyun Feel Things.  
  
Maybe it's just how Yixing is really cleaned up, and getting on really well with his parents, and some part of Baekhyun just wants that for himself. A handsome boyfriend that knows how to take care of him and his parents, is respectful and considerate and kind; everything Yixing just seems to be doing right now.  
  
It's probably just the idea of The Boyfriend. The One. Yixing just happens to be a stand-in for now. A good one, that's all.  
  
Yixing reaches over then, to tap at the side of Baekhyun's jaw. "You okay, babe? You keep zoning out."  
  
Baekhyun blinks, realizing he was staring _again_. "Ah, just getting lost in your eyes, you know. The usual." Not entirely a lie.  
  
Yixing almost winces, snorting at him. "You can do that whenever, your parents came to visit because they care about you, they're not always here to hang, you know?"  
  
His mom laughs. "Yixing's right you know. Be a better host, you're leaving Yixing to carry the both of you!"  
  
Baekhyun pouts, squeezing at Yixing's upper arm before bodily laying into his side. "But he's doing so well without me!"  
  
His father tsks. "Yixing, what did you see in this one again?"  
  
They all laugh, and Baekhyun's back, his introspective Yixing ponderings put on hold for the rest of dinner.  
  
  
  
Dinner was really good. His mom seemed Positively Delighted, not only with the food and the restaurant, but with Yixing as well. And his dad, although he's always generally very kind and jovial and good natured, seemed to be in an especially good mood.  
  
The bāozi and the xiǎo lóng bāo (Baekhyun finally learned) were hits for his parents, and the soup-filled centers, as usual, were just right. There was something so healing about seeing his parents experience something that's been kind of part and parcel of Baekhyun's life here.

Having to explain that they have to wait a bit before they eat it--because the soup inside can burn your tongue--felt so strange but right. His parents were finally the ones in the position of being enculturated, and there was nothing difficult or painful about it.

He's been through a lot with his parents, but they've gotten through what Baekhyun considers the darker part of his life, and they've made efforts on all sides to understand each other better, and it shows. He was a little worried that it all wouldn't hold, but he thinks he can attribute how smoothly dinner went to Yixing, who's currently fighting his parents for the check.  
  
There's something about that too, although Baekhyun wouldn't say it's exactly cathartic to see. He's not sure if it's fondness or pride, but something about how insistent Yixing is being, because they're hosting, even though Baekhyun's parents are older and would be totally happy to pay tickles him. The feeling is almost familiar, but he can't figure it out.  
  
It takes him the entire ride back home and then some before he does, brushing his teeth in Yixing's bathroom when he comes in, his nice sweater off, just wearing a tight tank top and sweats. It hits him then.  
  
Baekhyun is attracted to this boy.  
  
Yixing moves behind him, squeezing at Baekhyun’s sides as he goes to grab his own toothbrush, and Baekhyun’s stomach does a strange swoopy thing that he’s not sure he’s okay with.  
  
“I”m really happy your parents like me, I was worried they wouldn’t.” Yixing’s smiling, and there’s his dimple, which somehow looks unbearably cute today, despite the fact that Baekhyun has been seeing it for years and years.  
  
“Why wouldn’t they? You’re cute and nice and sweet and do all the right boyfriend things. Any parent would love you.” _I could love you._  
  
He wishes he had a button he could press that would turn off errant thoughts. This can’t be good for either of them.  
  
Yixing shrugs, blissfully unaware of the storm that’s starting in Baekhyun’s head. “You don’t know that. I could have really messed up, and they might’ve hated me.”  
  
Baekhyun can at least manage an eyeroll at that, rinsing and spitting out his toothpaste. “Except you’re literally the definition of a sweetheart and my parents can tell that kind of shit. Just let yourself be the golden boy that you are. The rest of us actually have to pretend you know.”  
  
He reaches over to smack Yixing’s side before checking his teeth one last time, starting the next steps in his skincare routine. He already wiped off his makeup and washed his face, so he’s just got to tone and moisturize.  
  
“Okay, okay, you win. No more complaining about being nervous for perfectly valid reasons.”  
  
Yixing smiles around his toothbrush at him when he pokes his tongue out at him and it hits him with a pang how properly domestic this is, how comfortable they are being in such close quarters. That they could have actually had this before this whole fiasco started.

That it didn’t have to be a lie.  
  
Suddenly, this feels like a really, truly terrible idea, but Baekhyun doesn’t see any way out but through it. His parents are involved, and there’s really no delicate way to tell Yixing they might be in a fake relationship, but Baekhyun’s starting to catch some real feelings. There just isn’t.  
  
He’s just finished patting lotion into his face when Yixing finishes brushing his teeth, reaching over again to squeeze at his hip.  
“If you’re done, I gotta shower, unless you wanna join me?”  
  
“Ah, I’m a little wiped out. Maybe next time.” He tries to smile, but it doesn’t work out, so he turns it into a yawn. This used to be so casual, he bemoans inwardly. He misses when Yixing’s touches didn’t feel like they started a slow fire under his skin on contact. Yixing’s just joking, even though Baekhyun doesn't have problems showering with his friends.  
  
That’s the thing though, isn’t it? Yixing used to be just a friend to him.  
  
Baekhyun goes to bed that night, staring at Yixing’s profile in the moonlight, wondering. Who is this person? What happened to his old roommate? Is he just lonely, is that what this is?  
  
He falls asleep like that, arm tucked underneath himself, more questions than answers.

  
  
In the morning, Baekhyun wakes up to an empty bed, and somehow… Somehow, despite falling asleep alone for months before this, yesterday even, something feels wrong.  
  
It’s not a habit thing—it can’t be. Yixing is familiar, but this isn’t habitual. Nothing about what Baekhyun is feeling is habitual or familiar, but he wanted—he wanted that, the experience of waking up next to Yixing. As much as he doesn’t understand it, it’s what he’s feeling.  
  
He finds Yixing entertaining his parents, cooking breakfast for them - spring onion pancake and eggs with a side of oj. Not an unfamiliar breakfast combination for Baekhyun, not by a long shot, living with Yixing, but everything about _this_ breakfast feels different. New.  
  
He’s serving his parents while they chatter happily about how they have a similar dish to-how did Yixing say it? Cōng yóu bǐng, he repeats. Cōng, he stresses, the Chinese consonants sounding so natural in his mouth where they tumble messily from his parents’ Korean-American tongues. It’s so different, they exclaim. Pajeon, so different, even though it’s such a similar dish!  
  
Before they can see him, lurking in the hallway, watching them from across the living room, he turns back towards Yixing’s room to brush his teeth, brush his hair, something. Something he can do with his hands, something to make him at least look presentable, even if he doesn’t feel it.  
  
Nothing makes sense anymore; everything is the same, but so different.  
  
He walks into the bathroom in a haze, moving to brush his teeth almost violently, as if cleaning his teeth will help him understand, will wake him up from all of this.  
  
He only heads back out when he’s scrubbed his face clean and moisturized, staring into the mirror until his stomach growls. Everything about the world he’s created for himself is starting to feel damning.

Entering the kitchen almost cautiously, he’s met with an array of various greetings.  
  
His father’s familiar, ”Someone finally decided to join the living, eh?”  
  
His mother’s gently naggy, “Oh my, good morning, sleepyhead. All the food is cold by now!”  
  
And worst of all, Yixing’s “Morning baby,” followed by an embrace and a kiss to his forehead.  
  
Baekhyun is surprised he manages to respond, his ‘morning’, just a pale echo.  
  
Some part of Baekhyun feels weird about how Natural it all feels. How Yixing and his parents get along, how comfortable he is kissing Baekhyun’s forehead in front of them, cooking for them. Like Yixing’s exactly the kind of boy that his parents really Would want him to come home with. Like Yixing really is the ideal boyfriend.  
  
Baekhyun doesn’t know what he feels more: guilt because he’s making Yixing go through all of this, or the creeping feeling that he really wants this, he wants Yixing just like this, but this whole situation is all wrong. It’s make believe, and it only just started, but once his parents walk out their front door for good, it’s over.  
  
Pouring himself a glass of juice while Yixing works on his breakfast, he decides it might as well be good, if it’s going to have to end. It’s a show he signed them up for, anyway, so it’s a show his parents are going to get.  
  
“Yixing,” his mom starts. “Do you you always make breakfast for our Baekhyunnie?”  
  
Baekhyun pokes his tongue out at him, putting on a petulant frown. Lying, for better or for worse, had always been second nature for him. “Not always. Sometime’s he’s nice, but sometimes I have to fend for myself.”  
  
Yixing chuckles, the picture of content boyfriend, hair the perfect kind of messy. Baekhyun shocks himself with his own runaway thoughts: he wants to push his fingers through it, put his face in it, kiss it.  
  
“And Sometimes,” Yixing starts, completely unaware of how perfectly domestic he looks, punctuating his words with a spatula, “he resorts to whining and begging.”  
  
His mother tsks at him.  
  
“Baekhyun! You should be cooking for Yixing too, why are you making this poor boy make you breakfast all the time, mm? Cham.”  
  
Yixing snickers, shoulders shaking in amusement from where he’d turned back to the spring onion pancake and eggs, moving to plate them.  
  
He hums. “It would be nice, once in awhile,” he pauses to look at Baekhyun, bottom lip jutting in a little pout. He can’t tell if Yixing’s being serious or flirting with him for the sake of his parents. “But I don’t mind keeping Baekhyun well fed.”  
  
His heart stills.  
  
Baekhyun’s eating disorder is a topic everyone at the table is too deeply familiar with. Yixing caught him in the middle of a relapse, pulling him out of it and feeding him. He hasn’t gone back ever since. He never wanted to disappoint Yixing, not after all he did for him.  
  
This is different though. There’s something caring behind the intent of his words. Yixing never remotely mentioned it to anyone, not even people who knew. But this, this felt like an indirect promise to his parents. That Yixing would take care of him. He feels his heart lodging itself into his throat.  
  
His mother just smiles serenely at him, while his father looks away, blinking away near tears. “Thank you for taking care of our Baekhyunnie, Yixing. Seriously, thank you.”  
  
Yixing just smiles bashfully, all of his dimples showing. “It’s nothing,” he says, setting the plate down in front of Baekhyun. It smells mouthwatering. “I’m happy to care for him.”  
  
There’s something tender there in Yixing’s eyes, and, not for the first time, it makes Baekhyun eat with intention, savoring every bite of his cooking.  
  
  
  
They go to Pike later that morning, which is honestly not that exciting, but they tour around the outlets since his parents haven’t been, waiting on Sehun to text. He works at the Aquarium of the Pacific as a marine biology research assistant, so he can get them in from the researcher’s side entrance without them having to pay admission, which is honestly the only interesting thing about Sehun’s job, in Baekhyun’s opinion.  
  
Not that he doesn’t think that studying the reproductive patterns of seahorses and eels isn’t totally fascinating, but he’d rather just eat seafood than study it.

They’re getting lost inside a giant furniture store, gaudy and overdone with the ‘chic beach’ aesthetic, when Sehun finally responds, saying that the signal in the lab is really awful, and that they can come now if they want.  
  
He goes to grab Yixing, lacing their fingers together and hooking his chin over his shoulder. “Let’s go, Sehun says we’re good.”  
  
Yixing turns his head to look at his, fingers reaching up to tap at his bottom lip. “Mm. We have been pretty good, haven’t we?”  
  
Baekhyun hums dumbly, not knowing what that was about. His lips feel tingly where Yixing touched them and he’s not sure how he feels about that.  
  
  
  
He’s not sure why he thought this was a good idea. He’s sure his parents are intrigued about something and are close by, but honestly, watching Yixing watch jellyfish, completely fascinated, feels like a bad idea. A very terrible one.  
  
Yixing’s face is lit up in a way that Baekhyun doesn’t see very often, something almost childlike and pure in the way that he gazes on, as if in awe.

“I wonder what it’d be like—what it’d be like to have the consciousness of a jellyfish. To exist only in electricity, influenced only by the motion of the ocean you live in.”

Baekhyun lays his head against the glass, considering him. The fluorescent lights cast Yixing's features in a pretty blue glow, and he wonders when it’ll stop hitting him that Yixing is kind of really beautiful.

“How do you know jellyfish don’t deal with social pressure? Are you sure you’re not projecting a romanticized understanding of jellies because you just _want to_ _think_ they live simple lives?”  
  
Yixing moves to mirror his position, laying his head against the glass, facing him. It’s a little intimate, but neither of them move. They’re used to this, being too close. “You might just be right, Byun. But isn’t it a nice thought? Just existing? No expectation?”  
  
Baekhyun doesn’t get to answer the question because Yixing’s eyes flick over his shoulder, and he hears his parents’ voices as they round the corner.

 

\--

  
  
  
It’s already the middle of the week, but Yixing’s dreading nights now because Baekhyun is so clingy in his sleep and Yixing just can’t.  
  
Sometimes, like tonight, he’ll indulge himself, let his arms wrap so so slowly around the small of Baekhyun’s back. Lets himself pretend that he can have this, pretend that Baekhyun is in his bed because he really wants to be and doesn’t want to be anywhere else.  
  
But he can never sleep. It’s just frustrating for him to be this close, for this situation to bring them together like this. He can feel Baekhyun’s lips against the threadbare material of his shirt, and he has to close his eyes, let out a breath to keep himself from leaning down and tasting them for himself.  
  
He’s in the process of trying to will himself to sleep when Baekhyun turns in his sleep, moaning quietly before tossing his leg over Yixing’s side. Tonight’s going to be another sleepless one.  
  
Unfortunately for him, Yixing couldn’t get all the days of the two weeks Baekhyun’s parents are visiting for off so there are days where he has to go to work, and tomorrow happens to be one of them. It’s an opening shift, so he figures sleep isn’t going to really help him at this point anyway. Maybe he’ll get a nap in when he gets back before going to see what Baekhyun and his parents are up to, who knows.  
  
Baekhyun sighs softly in his sleep, right up against his neck now, and Yixing has to suppress a shiver. He’s sensitive there. The fact that it’s Baekhyun doesn’t help. He gives up on sleep for good, fingers moving to trace gentle circles into Baekhyun’s back.  
  
As much as it hurts that Baekhyun’s only here because of this whole mess, he’s going to miss this, he knows it. He’s going to miss the way Baekhyun’s back rises and falls beneath his hands, how much more physical and emotional affection he gives Yixing under the pretense of dating and fondness and fabricated love. He doesn’t know if he’s starving for it, but it’s nice, even if it’s pretend.  
  
But after his parents leave next Sunday, Baekhyun’s going to move back to his room, and it’ll… it’ll all be over. There’ll be no excuses for Yixing if he wants to randomly kiss Baekhyun’s cheek. No one to play boyfriend for. He wishes he was asleep, or that this was someone else’s life. Suddenly, getting ready for work at dawn doesn’t seem so bad, in comparison. At least there, he can get out of his head a little.

 

\--

  
  
“In college, huh?”  
  
“Mm. We had mutual friends, and it started like that. Just friends.”  
  
They just parked, and they already have ice cream samples. Baekhyun loves First Thursdays Artwalks.  
  
He sees another Korean family, chatting as they stroll along, and something unnameable swells in his chest. Pride? Solidarity? It feels like something in between. Sometimes he wonders what it would be like to live somewhere else, to not ever see any other Asian people when he went out. It’s only in moments like these when he remembers to be grateful for living here, to have community, even if it’s sometimes in the most fleeting sense of the word.  
  
His mother interrupts his thoughts after dropping her sample cup into a trash receptacle, lilting Korean passing through his ears because he’s not paying attention.  
  
“What?”  
  
“Are you still in contact with them?” she repeats, a little less patient.  
  
He nods. Thankfully, he doesn’t have to speak in half truths about that. “Mm. Almost all of us still hang out, even if not together. We’re actually going to run into a few of them today—your son is connected to some very talented people, you know.”  
  
“Ah, Kyungsoo still does art, mm?”  
  
Baekhyun nods. It’s a little terrifying how much she remembers about his life. Baekhyun brought Kyungsoo home literally all of one time, and that was just because they both missed home cooked dinner, and Kyungsoo wasn’t in the mood to cook for them that one time however many years back when Kyungsoo was his roommate in college.  
  
Luckily, it’s just his mom that is a nosy and uncannily observant hoarder of weird details, he thinks, looking over at his dad try to flag down another person handing out samples. He’s not sure how he’d feel about the pressure of dealing with that two times over.  
  
“He’s still painting. His gallery is coming up right after the popcorn stand, actually. Do you see it?”  
  
It’s a strange building—a toss up between Kyungsoo’s abstract-gothic aesthetic and Minseok’s minimalist sensibilities. It’s tall and slightly asymmetrical, but has clean lines and circular cutouts in the columns.  
  
“Wah,” his parents respond simultaneously.  
  
“Did Kyungsoo design it like that?” His father asks, sounding impressed.  
  
“Yeah, with his partner—Minseok. He’s our friend too, you might even like him better than Kyungsoo, Eomma.”  
  
She laughs, letting him lead the way inside.  
  
The gallery is pretty open plan, and Minseok is right by the door, a pile of pamphlets beside him at his desk. He’s about to greet Baekhyun, but then stops after seeing his parents, bowing and greeting them politely in Korean before turning his attention back to him.  
  
“Howdy stranger, didn’t know you were coming in today.”  
  
Baekhyun gasps. “As if I would miss your exhibit today—First Thursdays are sacred!”  
  
Minseok tsks, turning to look at his parents. “Don’t believe him, he misses our exhibits all the time.”  
  
His parents both laugh good naturedly. “Oh we know,” his father responds, draping an arm around Baekhyun’s shoulders. “He’s always been prone to running his mouth, this one.”  
  
Baekhyun tries not to think about how that continues to be the case even now. Thankfully, Kyungsoo comes down from the loft then, and he doesn’t have to dwell on it much.  
  
“Soo!”  
  
Kyungsoo’s expression lights up with recognition as he’s crossing the gallery space, bowing as he walks over, greeting his parents formally. “Have you taken a look around yet? Today’s exhibit is pretty neat, I think.”  
  
They’re led around the gallery space, broken up by Minseok’s deeply meticulous ceramic pieces, from giant urns looking partially liquefied, melting into a sewer grate in the floor, to hyperrealistic depictions of two girls, one painting the other’s nails while a jenga tower teeters precariously between them. Baekhyun is almost entirely sure they’re modeled after Junmyeon and Jongdae, though he’ll have to ask why later.  
  
Minseok’s works are larger than life and the detail he exercises in his work is incredible, invoking a kind of necessary silence at the awe of his craftsmanship. Baekhyun is pretty sure this is the longest he and his mom have gone in a room together without one of them having something to say. Both of them are such chatterboxes, but Minseok's work has the effect of installation pieces, they’re large and invite you into a segment of their own universe, encourage you to question. He’s always been a fan.  
  
Kyungsoo’s paintings are no less impressive, canvas spanning the entirety of the wallspace, way up into the rafters, immaterial dark entities hovering around black and white generally mundane objects, a kitten about to spring off a banister, a boy sobbing at a table, a raven looking on almost sympathetically, a man dangling off a cliff. The color palette Kyungsoo sticks to is pretty dark, mostly whites and blacks and greys, only veering into the realm of other colors in terms of dark blues and bruised purples, but there’s something so dynamic about them, and the strange mural-like quality they have, even though it’s unclear if they’re meant to be narrative or connected at all.  
  
“Wow,” Baekhyun breathes. He never ceases to be stunned by what Minseok and Kyungsoo come up with. It’s always creative, and the mastery of their particular mediums show, always managing to highlight one another rather than upstaging. He figures it’s a little like their relationship, in some ways.  
  
His mom leans closer to one of Kyungsoo’s paintings, studying the linework. “Kyungsoo-yah, this is so beautiful,” she murmurs. “The application is so precise, the movement is so dynamic, huh?”  
  
“Minseok’s craftmanship too, huh?” His father calls over, from behind a piece depicting a girl hanging in a contorted yoga position from a hammock. “This is unreal, the proportions, the detail to the fabric, the lines of the body, at this size? And the fact that this is ceramics? Fired in an oven? Unbelievable.”  
  
Minseok and Kyungsoo wear near twin expressions, bashful but pleased. “Thank you, Abeonim, I’m glad you like it. The process is pretty labor intensive, but I enjoy challenging myself when it comes to difficult or finicky mediums, especially ceramics. It’s cultural tradition, you know? People see it as limited to domestic uses, but I wanted to change how people see it.”  
  
His father nods, in serious artist mode now. “It truly is a feat, though, these kinds of proportions at this size staying intact like this. You could have gone with far more forgiving mediums! Is there a reason you wanted to portray this pose, or yoga through ceramics? Are the pieces connected?”  
  
“Well, the whole gallery is meant to be playing with the dynamics of tension and release, and I wanted to do this through inanimate objects as well as animate human life, and-”  
  
Over by the wall, Kyungsoo calmly explains his thought process and method to his mother, before he’s getting pulled over to yet another piece. Baekhyun can tell they’ll be here for a while. He doesn’t mind too much.

He goes to grab a lollipop from the front desk, going to peruse around the gallery on his own a little. His parents get to nerd out with his friends, and he gets a little time to himself. It’s a win-win situation.  
  
  
  
  
Later, after his parents harass Kyungsoo and Minseok for long enough, Baekhyun drags them out, promising to meet up later. They zoom through a couple more galleries and shops, snacking on the free tapas along the way. There’s other cool art, some interesting, some thought provoking, but nothing, as usual, really lives up to the calibre of Kyungsoo and Minseok’s gallery. He does see a rainbow covered canvas with a graphic captioned ‘Too cute to be Straight’ stenciled across, though, which tickles him a bit.  
  
Soon enough, the sun is starting to dip, sitting low in the sky, and he has to rush his parents out of a balloon dart painting workshop. He feels a little bad because they seemed excited, but he promises they can come back after. This is time sensitive.  
  
They make it out to the side of the outdoor platform where the performers are playing, and some kid with a violin is just leaving the stage. They got here just in time. Chanyeol comes on, pushing his hair out of his eyes, setting his acoustic guitar across his lap while staff helps set his electric bass and lap-sized synth down beside him.  
  
He ducks his head, embarrassed when Baekhyun starts making a racket, cooing at him and encouraging his parents to join him, although they most certainly don’t.  
  
“Alright so hello everyone, I’m Chanyeol Park, as you may know if you’ve stuck around for First Thursdays through the years, or even just come a couple times recently. I got started with First Thursdays as a kid, and it’s really been a place where I could grow as a performer and musician, so I’m always grateful for being able to come back, and hopefully share some nice tunes with you all."

Chanyeol fidgets a little, readjusting himself on his seat before he continues. "Anyways, again, thank you so much First Thursdays for asking me back, again and again. This is always one of my favorite gigs. Without further ado, here’s ‘How Deep Is Your Love’, an acoustic toss-up between the Calvin Harris version and the Bee Gees version.”  
  
Baekhyun frowns. Yixing was supposed to do this one with Chanyeol today. They’d been practicing it together the past few weekends. Did something happen? It still sounds good, but it feels like something’s a little lacking, for him at least, missing the way Yixing’s clear melodic voice harmonizes with Chanyeol’s deeper sound. There’s so much that Chanyeol had to give up with this composition, without Yixing.  
  
Chanyeol segways into some original stuff, and the audience is wrapped up in it, but Baekhyun can’t help but worry. Yixing never mentioned a change of plans, did he? He checks his phone just in case. Nothing.  
  
He can’t really get into the songs, which he feels guilty about, since he’s here to support Chanyeol as much as he was here to support Minseok and Kyungsoo, but Yixing’s supposed to be here. He doesn’t understand why Chanyeol would change up the set unless Yixing wasn’t coming, but if Yixing wasn’t coming, he should have said something. He would have, wouldn’t he?  
  
Too soon, Chanyeol’s set sounds like it’s about to wrap up, but he’s pulling out a synth with talkbox tubing, playing the main chorus of Bruno Mar’s ‘That’s What I Like’, rather than saying it aloud because he has the end of the talkbox tube in his mouth, the crowd that's gathered cheering at the familiar tune.  
  
He plays the first beat of the song, and then Yixing is sliding onto the stage, the remaining ‘Aye’s’ coming from his mic. He’s wearing sunglasses and an all red outfit, shirt only half buttoned up, reminiscent of Bruno Mar’s, tossing Chanyeol another pair of glasses, which he promptly puts on, as well as the snapback that somehow materializes in Yixing’s hand after he does a completely necessary flip over to Chanyeol's side of the stage, the nerds brofisting before they start for real.  
  
Yixing performs with entirely too many hip thrusts, but his dancing remains precise and clean, managing to flirt with the entire audience with his narrative body language and dance style. Everyone seems to be having a good time, and it reminds him of when Yixing and Chanyeol would perform together at end of sem events, sometimes with him, too. It’s been awhile since they’ve gone all out like this, and it’s making him nostalgic.  
  
Suddenly, Yixing’s sliding forward on his knees, right in front of him, nearly eye-to-eye like this.  
  
He mimes cleaning off a mirror between them, still singing. “Take a look in that mirror, now tell me who’s the fairest? Is it you?” He points. “Is it me?” Yixing jerks his thumb towards himself, tilting his head in question before his expression melts back into a smug one. “Say it’s us, and I’ll agree, baby.” He blows a two-fingered kiss before throwing himself back to center-stage, the movement in his body impossibly fluid, making to ‘drive his cadillac’ around Chanyeol.  
  
Baekhyun wants to hate himself for feeling like a melty teenage girl, but Yixing has always, at least on stage, been too much of a playboy. Also, fortunately for him, they’ve all played around like this whenever they have friends in the audience, so Baekhyun is used to the special attention, at least in this context. Even though his messy confusing feelings about Yixing that keep bubbling up say something otherwise.  
  
Could he not have just unbuttoned two buttons? He’s basically shirtless.  
  
Baekhyun tries to watch Chanyeol instead, which is its own kind of fascinating. Both Chanyeol and Yixing took to instruments so easily, which is a talent of its own in the world of musicians, but Chanyeol’s affinity for incorporating strange instruments into his performances is another level altogether. He looks like he’s having the time of his life accompanying every pop, lock, and isolation Yixing does with perfectly timed chords, the burbly synth on top of the digital beat he’s playing fresh and somehow exactly what this performance needs.  
  
But as much as Baekhyun wants to pretend he can watch Chanyeol for the rest of the song, he can’t. His eyes keep straying to Yixing, who has now somehow incorporated b-boying into a largely free flowing hip hop performance. He’d taken the hat he’d given to Chanyeol earlier and put it on low over his face, windmilling for almost an entire minute, letting the momentum pull him into handstand, doing a push-up there before dropping down into some body rolls against the floor, and Baekhyun can’t help but wish it was _him_ instead of the stage floor.  
  
Honestly, when did Yixing get this unbearably sexy? Where did his weird nerdy roommate go? Why couldn't he have just stuck to playing his guitar with Chanyeol like they planned to?

Chanyeol segways out of the dance break, and Yixing leans up on an elbow, picking up the mic he’d laid down, laying on his side and looking for all the world like OC’s biggest playboy, even though his voice still has the clear, pretty quality it always does.  
  
“You say you want a good time,” he sings, eyes flicking over to Baekhyun now, “well here I am baby, here I am, baby. Talk to me, talk to me, talk to me, tell me what’s on your mind.”  
  
His heart feels like it stops a little, because it’s almost like Yixing knows, like he’s asking Baekhyun to tell him. But then Yixing moves to stand, engaging the rest of the audience and the moment is lost, leaving Baekhyun jarred. He only snaps out of it when his mom nudges him with an elbow, clapping along, since Yixing has apparently gotten the audience to do so.  
  
“The more I see him, the more I understand Yixing’s appeal. Our puppy has good taste, hm?”  
  
Baekhyun nods blankly. That’s the problem, he thinks to himself. The more he sees Yixing, the more appealing he is, but it’s been years. Why _now?_   Why only when he’s just pretending to date him because he couldn’t stand disappointing his mom? Why like this?  
  
Before he can agonize for any longer, the song ends and Yixing moves to sit in a seat that Baekhyun had either not noticed, or had been brought onto the stage while he was zoning out. Both are likely scenarios.  
  
“Alright, we’re going to scale it back a little,” Yixing says, buttoning his shirt back up, laughing when the crowd boos. He pockets his sunglasses and tosses the hat back to Chanyeol, ruffling his hair and nodding when Chanyeol looks over to him.  
  
“Not too much, though,” Chanyeol adds, while Yixing picks up his own guitar. “We’re not too good at staying boring. Anyway, there really is no need to introduce this one, you’ll know it when we start.”  
  
Chanyeol taps a button on his synth and begins to play the unmistakeable first notes of ‘Shape of You’, the tonal percussive quality added to another countermelody he’s playing underneath.  
  
Yixing comes in by rolling his knuckles against the soundboard of his guitar before knocking a beat against it, head lifting to encourage the audience to join in with claps. He waits for the beat to get established, letting Chanyeol play with the first two melodies before he hops in, playing the main melody slap-style, and despite hearing Yixing play constantly, there’s something about the technique and his presence that feels different. Like Yixing can’t do anything now without Baekhyun seeing it as being sexy.  
  
They trade lines, harmonizing when they’re not singing, until Chanyeol introduces a trap beat, blowing up the sound to the crowd’s delight. He takes over, Yixing standing to do some impressive isolations, from his fingers, into his arms, all the way down as he leans all the way back, nearly laying on the stage, before he builds back up with isolations bottom-up. Then he’s hopping up, body articulating every beat that Chanyeol lays out for him, something sharp and fluid all at once.  
  
The drop segways back into the main melody of the song, and Yixing takes his mic over to where Baekhyun and his parents are. _No,_ Baekhyun thinks. _Not again._  
  
“Babe, you know I want your love,” Yixing sings, dropping down in front of Baekhyun. He can feel his ears burning. “Your love was handmade for somebody like me,” he continues, hand pressed to his chest. “Come on now, follow my lead, I may be crazy, don’t mind me,” he sings, gesturing for Baekhyun to come up onto the stage with him.  
  
Baekhyun shakes his head, trying to look like he’s just casually embarrassed instead of mortified, but then Yixing tilts the mic over to him and Chanyeol plays like the whole performance is waiting for him, suspending chords and slowing the tempo, and he has to, he knows it. He concedes.  
  
“Say, boy, let's not talk too much, grab on my waist and put that body on me,” Baekhyun sings, a smile on his face despite his embarrassment, and the crowd erupts all around him, and Yixing is pulling him up onto the stage, looking so, so pleased. He twirls him, and Baekhyun can’t help but laugh at how ridiculous they’re being.  
  
“I'm in love with the shape of you,” Yixing begins, pulling him into a dance, tilting the mic back Baekhyun’s way.  
  
“We push and pull like a magnet do,” Baekhyun continues, laughing when Yixing twirls him out before bringing him back. “Although my heart is falling too, I'm in love with your body.”  
  
“Last night you were in my room,” Yixing adds, a playful glint in his eyes, “and now my bed sheets smell like you, everyday discovering something brand new—I'm in love with your body oh—I—oh—I—oh—I—oh—I I'm in love with your body.”  
  
Yixing breaks then to do some playful body rolls, and Baekhyun moves to follow before he just takes the mic, dancing with Yixing as he continues, taking his hand and doing a silly two-step.  
  
“Come on, be my baby, come on,” Baekhyun sings, “Come on, be my baby, come on.”  
  
The crowd starts singing along, and Baekhyun feels floaty, dancing backwards, pulling Yixing with him before he sits on his chair, feeling the end come on, Yixing falling into his lap. Just as Baekhyun sings the last ‘Come on, be my baby’, Yixing leans forward to kiss his cheek, and the crowd roars.  
  
Chanyeol stands, carrying his baby synth with them as they bow together and Baekhyun realizes how much he missed this, performing. But it’s when they get up, and Baekhyun has to get off the stage to rejoin his parents that he realizes how put on it all was. Yixing wasn’t doing it for him. Well, in some twisted way, he guesses Yixing did do it for him, but he was doing it because of his parents. They were literally putting on a show.  
  
His stomach drops as he sees his parents, looking jazzed, taking in their compliments with nods that he hopes look like embarrassment rather than empty confusion.  
  
“Was it fun? Of course it was fun. Oh my, it’s been so long since we’ve heard you sing, what a treat!”

“Mm, it was,” Baekhyun answers, trying to keep the crisis out of his voice.  
  
His mother leans in close, squeezing his arm as they make to leave. “Yixing is such a good one, he makes you laugh. That’s the most important thing. You should have seen yourself up there.”  
  
Baekhyun nods at that, a smile forming on his lips, unbidden. Despite his conflicting feelings, that remains true, at least. He had fun, it was a good time. “Yeah, yeah he does.”  
  
  
  
  
They’d agreed earlier that Yixing would come to meet them at The Whale, since he’d have to get his stuff backstage and take his guitar back to his car. Usually, Baekhyun would just wait for Chanyeol and Yixing, sometimes Jongin when he came down to perform too, and they’d explore the rest of artwalk together, usually just going to hang out in Kyungsoo and Minseok’s gallery until they closed up and conceded to go out.  
  
Today’s a little different since his parents are visiting, and Yixing didn’t want to make them wait for him, and besides, you had to touch The Whale at least once, and Baekhyun’s parents had not done so yet. The Whale was just this giant installation piece that was literally a gnarly looking whale completely covered in spiritual symbols and patterns that some local artist created and set out for people to enjoy. Baekhyun’s not even entirely sure if that’s its original title, but it’s what everyone calls it.  
  
They’re actually running a little late now, since they took a detour, taking a couple baked samples and tiny coffee shots from a pretty hipster looking café before getting sucked into a fantastical witchy magic themed shop. The shop owner was incredibly eccentric and very into his role, which made the experience pretty immersive, spooking his dad out a little bit.  
  
Yixing’s probably there already. He’s trying to hurry his parents along, but they’re easily distracted by all of the art, the twinkling lights and the free food. He gives up, deciding to just walk a little ways ahead of them so they get the picture. The Whale is just around the corner, and they can always come back after they get Yixing.  
  
He’s heading down a hall lined by small artist booths when his arm is being grabbed, the grip tight. Baekhyun rips his arm from their grasp, ready to give the person a piece of his mind, before he realizes he’s face to face with his ex. Taehyung.  
  
“So I haven’t heard from you much lately.”  
  
Baekhyun blinks, not expecting this at all. “Yeah, well. Things are different.”  
  
“I saw you earlier. On stage. You with that Chinese kid now?”  
  
Baekhyun sees red. Taehyung had always been like this, demanding answers, still possessive even when they weren’t together, didn’t mean anything to each other. “It’s none of your fucking business what I am to Yixing-”  
  
Taehyung ignores him, looking over his shoulder. “Those your parents?”  
  
He bristles, so unused to being blown off like this now. He’s not sure how he dealt with this before, how he couldn’t tell. Was it because he never raised his voice?  
  
He’s about to tell him off when a voice sounds off from behind, some distance away. It’s Yixing. “Step off Taehyung,” he bites out, expression dark as he’s walking over.  
  
Taehyung turns, expression an ugly kind of smug. “Or what, Ching-ching?”  
  
Yixing smiles then, something tight, like he’s holding something truly terrifying back. It’s the first time Baekhyun’s ever seen Yixing as menacing. “I’m not sure you’d want to know, actually.”  
  
Yixing walks past Taehyung, wrapping his arm around Baekhyun before he’s bowing to his parents, gesturing for them to go forward.  
  
Baekhyun feels something ugly curl at the pit of his stomach then, feeling so small, humiliated, like he needs to be protected, like Yixing sees him as fragile. He doesn’t push him away until they’re out of Taehyung’s sight, on their way to the parking lot, and Yixing doesn’t push, doesn’t ask why. Somehow it only makes him angrier.  
  
He barely speaks through dinner, even though they’re at his favorite tofu house. His parents chalk up his silent fuming and shoveling too-hot jiggae into his mouth as a result of a ruined day and leave him alone, deciding to carry on conversation with Yixing instead. He’s not sure if the worried looks Yixing sends over to him are supposed to make him more or less angry, but they don’t help.

It’s when they get back, in the relative privacy of Yixing’s bedroom that he cracks. “What the _fuck_ was that earlier Yixing.”

He has to keep his voice low, so it sounds like a hiss more than anything, but he’s not sure if it’s really the delivery that makes Yixing look so taken aback. “Um. What?”  
  
“When you fucking-!” Baekhyun has to cut himself off because he’s raising his voice. He’s always been terrible at volume control. He runs a hand through his hair, frustrated. “What you did back there, with Taehyung, when you fucking swooped in like I’m some kind of helpless damsel in distress? I could have fucking handled that shit.”  
  
_When you acted like my boyfriend_ , he doesn’t say. He asked for that.  
  
Yixing looks immediately guilty, and despite himself, some part of Baekhyun melts a little. “I’m sorry Baek—I just, he hurt you so bad, and _seeing him_ just. I didn’t mean to belittle you, or make you feel like you needed saving.”  
  
There’s something else that Baekhyun needs to get off his chest though. He crosses the room, going to sit on Yixing’s bed, pulling him to sit too. “Also, when—when you made me come onto the stage. I mean, I had fun, but I—You didn’t have to do that.”  
  
He doesn’t even know what he’s asking for, why he’s even saying this, but the way Yixing’s eyes shoot to the floor makes him feel like he’s not going to get it. “I… I was just trying to have a good show, you know. I know you miss it sometimes. Gigging.”  
  
Baekhyun sighs. “You still...didn’t have to do all that. I just. I know this is weird for both of us, but it doesn’t have to be like this, you know? Can I just. Can I have my best friend back? My roommate? I’m scared I’m losing him.”  
  
Yixing just nods, taking his eyes from the floor to meet Baekhyun’s, mouth curling into a little half smile, his ever familiar dimple making its reappearance. “I’m still here.”  
  
Baekhyun ignores the way his stomach swoops at that, leaning forward to hide his face over Yixing’s shoulder, not sure if he’s hugging Yixing to comfort him or to comfort himself. “Good,” he says, although he’s not entirely sure if he even agrees with what he said.  
  
  
  
  
The next day finds them at Yifan’s bougie deli and wine shop—or as he likes to say, his charcuterie and wine tasting company—which he carries on under the pretense that his name is Kris inside the store, for whatever reason.  
  
As much as he loves Yifan, he really is asking for it. “Morning bougie-ass. Yifan, this is my parents, Eomma, Appa, Yifan. Another college buddy, and expert in making meat sound more complicated than it really is.”  
  
“It’s Kris,” he mutters, before dipping his head, bowing at his parents.  
  
“Tch, is that anyway to treat friends that are feeding you,” his father reprimands.”Hello Kris.”  
  
Yixing nods sympathetically. “Abeonim is right. Even if _Kris_ runs the bougiest place this side of OC.”  
  
His mom has to hold back a giggle. “What?” Baekhyun exclaims. “Why is it okay if Yixing says it but not me?”  
  
Yifan rolls his eyes. “Very funny. Anyways, have a seat. Since I have a sense of humor and because I love you geeks, I’m still feeding you. I already prepared the menu for you.”  
  
And so they spend the afternoon eating fresh cuts of various prepared meats that have names that Baekhyun doesn’t bother to remember and sample various wines, and occasionally poke fun at how ridiculously knowledgeable Yifan happens to be about French meats and the different labels he pours for them.  
  
It’s all and all a good day in Baekhyun’s book, although how comfortable Yixing seems to be, how casually he adopts the same mellow, even tempered manner he always seems to have makes Baekhyun a little uneasy. Is it just him? Is he the only one that’s still bothered? He pushes away the disappointment, because he’s not really sure what kind of reaction he wanted anyway, and this is what he asked for, isn’t it?

He thinks maybe Yixing is a little too good at listening to him as he watches him hold his mom’s purse for her, but then they’re asking for his input on something, and he loses his train of thought.  
  
They scrap their plans for that night, teaching each other different card games. At first they start with basic Big 2, starting to move into more niche games with more complicated rules before Baekhyun’s dad calls it off to teach Yixing Go-stop. He goes to their room to retrieve a pack of the cards, and Baekhyun shouldn’t be surprised that he decided to bring them with him, because it’s his dad, but he could live without for two weeks. It hits him then that their first week is near over, and the nameless anxiety he’d forgotten for a couple of hours comes back.  
  
They play a couple of play-rounds, his dad laying out the cards occasionally to explain the point system, or different hypothetical situations and their outcomes, Yixing silently absorbing. Baekhyun catches himself thinking about how cute it is that Yixing’s so serious about this, but Yixing’s always been a giant strategy game nerd, and Baekhyun needs to get his shit together.  
  
Before they can get too into it, Baekhyun calls for a boba run as a break, because he needs sugar, and so will everyone else with the way his dad likes to play, so they go for a boba run. They end up at Class 302, even though the wait is fucking notorious, but they brought the cards, so even though it’s long, it’s not too bad.

They share a couple of the shaved milk snows and bring their bobas back with them. He's sure his parents can get boba from LA, but he's also sure they don't do it because they like staying in their comfort zone. This is as much Baekhyun trying to share what life is just like for him as it is him trying to get them to do things they don't normally do.

Peeking in the side-view mirror, watching his mom suck down her milk tea is validation enough for him. Mission success, ByunBaek.  
  
They get back, playing past Yixing letting his parents win, past his parents realizing that Yixing is doing that on purpose, and far into the competitive zone where his dad’s pride is on the line if he doesn’t beat Yixing at a game he just learned today, that his dad’s been playing his whole life.

Baekhyun’s starting to fall asleep at this point, just wanting some kind of resolution at this point. Yixing is too good, and his dad either needs to lose already, or figure his shit out.  
  
He throws his last cards down, and Yixing grimaces a little, his dimples showing. “I’m sorry, Abeonim,” he says, gently laying his own cards down, as if it will cushion the blow. “It was just luck.”  
  
Without celebration, Baekhyun mixes the cards, sticking them back in the case before leaving them in front of his now-mute father. He reaches over to grab Yixing’s arm, wanting to go to bed, but Yixing resists a little, looking over at his father with concern. Baekhyun shakes his head. “He’ll be over it by the morning. Sleep.”  
  
Not fully convinced, Yixing walks over on his knees to where his dad is still sitting to wrap his hand around his elbow. “Abeonim, is everything okay?”  
  
His father nods slowly, a small smile forming on his face. “You’re really an excellent strategist, Yixing. I’m very impressed.”  
  
Yixing beams at that, a happy, sleepy smile that makes Baekhyun feel melty. His guard is down, he’s tired. He’ll allow it.  
  
“Thank you Abeoji, I had fun. Thank you for showing me.”  
  
His father laughs at that. “Mm, thank you for the opportunity to play. It was a great few games we had, no? Ah, Baekhyunnie looks impatient, we should sleep, eo?”

Yixing nods, looking over at him. “Mm, you’re right. Wouldn’t want to make Baekhyunnie angry.”  
  
Baekhyun can only roll his eyes, taking Yixing’s arm to drag him across the carpet until he gets up himself.  
  
It’s the first night they both knock out immediately, actually sleeping through most of the morning the day after.  
  
  
  
  
The weekend passes by lazily. Worn out from the week, they spend Saturday resting and eating in, watching cooking shows in their pajamas, making simple meals and ordering in for dinner, which he has to remind his mom that he’s only doing for their sake, as a kind of treat.  
  
His mom, however, takes all the eating out as a sign that they don’t prepare food at home often and orders Baekhyun to take her to the market so she can start preparing dishes before they leave. Baekhyun whines about it, but all the late night cooking reminds him of home in a way that he’s forgotten about for a while.  


 

 

That Sunday they picnic on one of the Duffy boats that Jongin and Tao sneak for them, since they work for the boat company and have access to all the keys and actually know how to sail.

  
It’s not really out of the ordinary for the two of them to commandeer one of the off the clock boats on lazy afternoons, especially during off-season, so they take them out to go house watching around Newport and over to Balboa Island. The beachfront houses are honestly unreal, and they spend most of the afternoon talking about what they would do if they were that unbelievably wealthy while they feed each other kimbap, nakji bokkeum, and giant rice crackers from H-mart.  
  
At some point Tao gets knocked over the edge of the boat because Jongin tosses him an aloe drink that he throws a little too far when the boat jostles over a couple waves, but Tao gets better after some snuggles between Baekhyun and his mom and getting fed by her, so it all works out. No harm done.  
  
Yixing stays uncomfortably ideal, immediately jumping in after Tao even though Tao’s supposed to be the kid who works on a boat, his hair curling wet and glistening even as he pushes it back, out of his face. It’s honestly criminal, how good Yixing looks today.  
  
Baekhyun nearly squeaks when Yixing reaches over to wipe at the sauce left over from the nakji, mumbling something about how eating octopus is messy. Internally, he wonders again what it’ll be like in a week, what it’ll be like after his parents leave, and Yixing won’t have to pretend anymore. Is he pretending?  
  
He’s not sure if he can take anything back, or if they could go anywhere from what they had, but Baekhyun… Baekhyun wants more.

  
  
  
  
  
  
_If everybody had an ocean_  
_Across the U. S. A._  
_Then everybody'd be surfin'_  
_Like Californi-a_  
  
They're on their way to Crystal Cove State Park, playing a beach playlist Yixing had compiled for PCH road trips, which includes a couple of hits from The Beach Boys, just because. Baekhyun is doing the monkey in the passenger seat à la Johnny Bravo, window down, enjoying the breeze because he deserves it. He's been dealing with a lot lately, and he's going to enjoy this feel-good mood for as long as it lasts.  
  
The weather today is peak beach day weather, despite the fact that it's supposed to be autumn now. In fact, Chuseok is just a couple days away. It'll be good for them all to have a nice, relaxing day at the beach before the holiday madness descends upon them. His mom isn't exactly uptight about tradition, it's more the insane food prep that she insists on doing every time.

In any case, Baekhyun has to thank the California weather gods for the chance at a little preemptive reprieve.  
  
Baekhyun's mom hums happily as they pull into the State Park parking lot, stepping out once they're parked to take a deep breath of the ocean air. "Waa, you boys planned so much for our visit! I'm impressed! I was perfectly content with just staying at home and cooking!"  
  
"Ah, but then that would just make us bad hosts. We wanted you to have fun! See the sights," Yixing says, calling over from the trunk of the van, where he's unloading the cooler and towels before he realizes, patting his pockets for the parking placard Junmyeon had lent them, handing it to Baekhyun to hang on the rearview mirror so he can have his hands free to carry things.  
  
"Besides," Baekhyun says, shrugging a shoulder, going to take some things from Yixing after he locks the car. "with how plugged in we are with friends all over, there’s always somewhere to go or something free to eat. We just wanted to give you both a little taste of the good life, that's all."  
  
His parents laugh. "Ah yes, gratefully, thank you for allowing us to have a taste of the good life, Baekhyun-ah," his father jokes.  
  
"Mm," his mother agrees, though sincerely. "Our puppy is so well taken care of and so happy, I'm so glad."  
  
They're parked in the tiny lifeguard parking lot that no one besides beach staff knows about, which is a lot closer to the beach than the public lot, which is a winding near-mile walk down, and on top of that, because they have one of Junmyeon's parking permits, they don't have to pay the fifteen bucks that you'd have to fork over if you were parking there either.  
  
They take the ramp over to the ranger building, flashing Junmyeon's badge at the park ranger that looks over at them curiously from his desk, and they take their exit, skirting around the life guard tower to meet Junmyeon out front. He's wearing his bright red waterproof lifeguard staff jacket, and he's bowing to his parents, engaging them in polite Korean and his pretty smile.  
  
It reminds Baekhyun of when they were in highschool, and Junmyeon was on the newspaper writing staff with him, but he'd always show up with his hair wet, smiling, still wearing his water polo hoodie after practice. ASB president, on the newspaper, the yearbook, water polo. Baekhyun used to wonder if he'd end up with Junmyeon, or someone like him, someone almost too perfect. But then, the more time you spent with Junmyeon, the more you realized it was a front. He was ambitious, true, and had the capacity to devote himself to things in ungodly ways, but he was also a giant nerd and a slob at heart. Baekhyun loves him, but Junmyeon also has his own kinds of messes going on.  
  
He doesn't realize he's zoning out until Junmyeon's asking him something. "What?"  
  
"I said, my shift ends in about three hours. If you're still around I could take you around the trails in one of the park vehicles, and then we could go pay Luhan and Jongdae a visit for dinner?"  
  
"Oh! Yes, please drive us around in your fancy golf cart, lifeguard-nim."  
  
Junmyeon rolls his eyes, though he's holding back a fond smile. "Okay, enough. Go, let me do my job now." He turns to his parents, bowing again. "Have a nice day, Eommeonim, Abeonim." To Yixing, he just pats his butt. "See you later."  
  
They say their goodbyes and head over to drop their stuff off in a relatively shady spot by the cliff face. They brought umbrellas just in case, but it doesn't really look like they'll need it. His mom still makes a big fuss about putting sunscreen on everyone, including Yixing, and Baekhyun doesn't know if he should feel embarrassed that his mom is being overbearing or charmed because Yixing is ticklish and trying to refuse.

In any case, despite Yixing's valiant efforts, his mother is a force that cannot be reckoned with, and he surrenders in a fit of hiccupy giggles to everyone's amusement.  
  
The ocean looks unreal here. He’s not sure if it’s just because it’s a protected beach, but the water is so much clearer than he’s used to seeing, and the water looks like it’s sparkling, from a distance. Laying out the blanket, he makes a mental note to come back more often. There’s something about the ocean, and coming to the beach on weird weekdays that just sits right with him. Like something about the ocean is inherently healing.  
  
They have kimbap this time, too, but they also have a number of side dishes, since his mom spent all of Monday preparing various preserved dishes to set in containers and essentially stock their fridge with ready to eat foods.  
  
He watches as his mom sets kong namul and sigumchi namul, seasoned bean sprouts and spinach, into Yixing's tin of rice, before feeding him a piece of soy sauce braised beef. Yixing flushes under the attention, but his mom is just happy to have someone to baby.  
  
She pours some barley tea out in the little cup under the cap of the thermos. "Bori cha?" she asks, Yixing taking it gratefully. "It's the same in Chinese, isn't it, cha?"  
  
Yixing nods. "Chá, it's the same. I wonder how many words we share?"  
  
His mom hums. "It's probably more than I can tell, our languages are family, you know."  
  
Yixing nods, smiling as he digs in. Baekhyun doesn't know he's staring until Yixing looks over, picking up a piece of braised beef with his chopsticks and holding it out for him, mistaking his gaze for some kind of nonverbal indication that he wants food. He can feel the blood rushing to his face, even as he leans over to take it from his chopsticks. What else is he supposed to do? Say no? Actually I was just longingly gazing at you eat the food my mom cooked?  
  
He realizes belatedly that the slow deliberate way that he'd ended up taking the meat could have seemed a little sexual, from the way Yixing averts his eyes, but oh well, damage done.  
  
They finish eating, and Yixing and his father decide to go over to the tidepools to check out the anemones and urchins. Normally, Baekhyun would go too, but he figures a little distance from Yixing now and again is probably good for him (less embarrassing) and besides, his mom still has sweet rice cakes.  
  
Yixing comes back with a crab, because he wants to show Baekhyun, but then it pinches him and he bleeds, the evil little fucker dropping to scuttle behind some nearby rocks. His mom tends to Yixing's wound, wrapping a torn segment of the cloth she used to bind up their lunch tightly around his thumb, while Baekhyun feeds him a sweet rice cake. It was for a noble cause, although Baekhyun isn't sure why Yixing had to go and do that. Baekhyun has seen crabs before.  
  
Junmyeon comes to find them a little later, helping them carry towels back to the ranger center before they’re taking off in one of the golf carts. The forest feels like it’s a blur around him, and it’s familiar, the feeling it evokes. Like everything is a distorted mess, going too fast for Baekhyun to distinguish one thing from the next. He wonders when it will end. If it will end.

 

  
  
The poke at Jongdae and Luhan’s poke bar is, as usual, phenomenal. Because they’re based ocean-side and have connections to the fish markets here, they always have the freshest stuff. He’s sandwiched between Yixing and Junmyeon, Jongdae and Luhan bringing over their drinks before sitting on either end of them, when Baekhyun looks up, noticing that his mom is squinting at them all.  
  
“What is it ‘mma?”  
  
“How is it that every single last one of your friends is this handsome? Does it make sense?” she asks, gesticulating loosely at the five of them. “Are you only showing me the good-looking ones?”  
  
Baekhyun snickers, everyone bowing their heads and hiding smiles at the praise. “What can I say, mom? Pretty attracts pretty.”  
  
She clucks, making to swipe her hand at his face. “Tch, this kid. Always making everything about himself. You’re not even the prettiest one here!”  
  
“I respectfully disagree, Eommoni,” Yixing says quietly, smile in his voice.  
  
Baekhyun’s too preoccupied with the way the table erupts with the sounds of middle school hazing (mostly Luhan and Jongdae) and the way he’s sure all of his blood must rush to his face to notice the way that Yixing’s gaze lingers.

 

\--

  
  
  
Chuseok is three days, the same as Zhōngqiū Jié, which isn’t surprising because it’s the same holiday; Mid-Autumn Harvest. Yixing was wondering earlier when they were planning their two-week stay if they would want to go to a lantern festival, since that might be an interesting event for everyone. But like Zhōngqiū Jié, Chuseok is mostly about coming together and eating together as a family, so Yixing just adds a couple boxes of mooncakes to their increasingly cluttered counter and tries to help out with cooking as much as Baekhyun’s mom will let him.  
  
He’s getting decent at making songpyeon, the colorful half-moon shaped rice cakes, stuffed with a sweet filling made of roasted sesame seeds and honey. She lets him try some, and they’re a little addicting. Baekhyun helps too, but it feels almost as if his mom is entrusting Yixing with the traditions of recipe and learning how to parse ingredients together, how to eyeball measurements, when to taste.  
  
She had already prepared most of the side dishes, but it feels like she has an endless list of dishes she needs to prepare. Yixing learns so many; the differences between galbijjim and maeun dwaeji galbijjim, braised short ribs versus slow cooked pork short ribs. Kkaenip jeon, wanjajeon, hoobakjeon, saewoojeon, saengseonjeon; stuffed perilla leaves fried in egg batter, meatballs fried in egg batter, shrimp fried in egg batter, fish fried in egg batter. Muguk, radish soup. Japchae, glass noodle stir fry.  
  
By the end of the day, Yixing’s hands feel raw, and he feels immense respect for Baekhyun’s mother and moms everywhere, carrying the weight of tradition. He says as much and she just smiles to herself, saying she’s thankful she’ll have a son who cares this much. The implication goes down pretty heavy, but then she’s joking about how there’s still more to prepare tomorrow, and Yixing has to bite his tongue to stay present.  
  
He doesn’t sleep much that night.  
  
  
  
  
Yixing wakes up to Baekhyun's face only centimeters away from his, and even more than not being able to wake him up with kisses, it hurts to think about how, after tomorrow morning, he won't even have this anymore. He tries not to sigh, reaching up to brush Baekhyun's bangs out of his eyes, revealing the mole at his temple. Baekhyun is covered in moles, and they're all in such kissable places.  
  
Before he does anything he'll regret later, he gets up to brush his teeth, missing the way Baekhyun's eyes flutter open when he closes the door to the bathroom.  
  
The rest of the gang is coming over today, since Baekhyun's mom has somehow taken them all in as extended sons and 'you don't neglect family on Chuseok', so they have to prepare the rest of the dishes and plate them. She's also given them the task of peeling Asian pears and apples, bringing out the special dishes that she had brought solely for this occasion out of her luggage, (so that's why she had so much baggage) carefully washing them before she ladles food out onto them.  
  
She gets Baekhyun to completely clear off the table, starting to set it up. The fruit goes on one side, and the side dishes are set next to one another, and the meats have their own places, as well as the fried egg batter dishes. The songpyeon goes at the top, a candle on either end. "Charye," she murmurs to him. "charye."  
  
Baekhyun's father comes over to pour soju into three different cups, and bows twice, Baekhyun and his mom following after. Yixing follows too, not wanting to break custom.  
  
"For our ancestors," she explains.  
  
Not soon after, people start trickling in from work. Yixing got used to that too, not having work everyday. He got lucky just having to go for a couple days during their visit. There wasn't a lot of time to schedule ahead. Yifan and Junmyeon show up first, bringing a platter of various cured meats and a selection of wine with them, and Minseok and Kyungsoo show up not too long after, bringing their own rice cakes, as well as a linguini dish stirfried with kimchi.  
  
He'd expect Jongin and Tao to come next, because they don't get out very late usually, especially not when it's not boating season, but instead Chanyeol comes with Luhan and Jongdae, carrying coolers of poke ingredients. There's barely enough space for the food, let alone the bodies in the apartment, but they manage to organize and reorganize, so there's enough surface area for food and for people.  
  
He's about to text when Jongin, Sehun and Tao show up together twenty minutes later, only carrying a single liter of ginger ale between the three of them, but it's fine because they really don't need anymore food at this point.  
  
Everyone's gotten comfortable, taking little nibbles while they were waiting. Baekhyun's dad has engaged Kyungsoo, Junmyeon, Chanyeol, Luhan and Minseok in conversation, which Yixing wouldn't have figured would have happened, especially since Kyungsoo and Minseok generally aren't into socializing much with strangers, or in groups, especially at parties. Maybe they have a common interest with Baekhyun's dad. Yixing shouldn't be talking, since he's not particularly good at parties either, but it just seemed unlikely.  
  
Yifan is in the kitchen with Baekhyun's mom, and it's a little amusing, seeing how he towers over her in the cramped space, but listens to her explanations of how certain dishes are prepared attentively, pulling out his phone to take notes. Sehun, Tao and Jongin are dogpiling Baekhyun on the couch, which is one of the customary ways they like to greet each other, which leaves...  
  
Someone comes up behind him blowing a puff of air at his neck, and he startles, both surprised and sensitive there. He turns around, covering his neck with his hands. It's Jongdae. It left Jongdae.  
  
"Hey, loverboy," he says, looking completely unapologetic, not that Yixing ever expects Jongdae to ever be apologetic. The man knows no shame.  
  
"What's up, Dae?"  
  
"That's what I came here to ask _you,"_ he emphasizes, head tilting. "How are things with Baekhyun?"  
  
Yixing scoffs, looking away. "Well, I have less than a day left, and he roommate-zoned me last week, so."  
  
"Listen. I know you're probably going to let this drag on for fucking years before you realize, but it's not just you, okay?"  
  
"You weren't there Dae, he had a whole freakout on me, I don't know why you keep-"  
  
"If we pretend to get in a fight," Jongdae whispers, speaking even lower than he was previously, "how much do you want to bet Baekhyun will come either sock me, or scream my ear off."  
  
"Dae, I swear to god, it's a family holiday, I've worked so hard so nothing fucking goes wr-"  
  
But then Jongdae trips him from behind and he's on his back, Jongdae dropping down to sit on his stomach before yelling, "YOU CAN'T JUST SAY HE'E IS WORSE THAN AHI, YIXING, GOD!"  
  
Yixing just stares at the ceiling, wondering what the fuck is the point of all of this, and what he did in his past life to deserve Jongdae as a friend in this one, but then Baekhyun is bowling Jongdae over in the next second, despite being all the way across the room, rattling him like he's a doll.  
  
"DAE NO ONE FUCKING CARES ABOUT YOUR FUCKING RAW FISH PREFERENCES, STOP TRYING TO RUIN CHUSEOK," he screams, arm reaching back to slap him across the face, but then Yixing catches his arm and Baekhyun turns to look at him, angry for a split second, before he recognizes who it is, expression melting immediately. Maybe Jongdae had a point there.  
  
"You okay?" Baekhyun asks, voice soft, a stark contrast to how he was just speaking, or screaming rather, at Jongdae.  
  
Yixing nods, squeezing Baekhyun's arm in reassurance. "It's fine."  
  
The whole room has gone silent, but then Baekhyun's mom takes a pair of metal chopsticks to a glass. "I think it's time to eat, don't you think?"  
  
And then everything goes back to normal. Bless moms. Baekhyun gets off of Jongdae, but not without sending him a threatening look first, before moving to pull Yixing to his feet. Jongdae raises his eyebrows at him when he catches his eye from the floor as Baekhyun's dragging him to the table. He's not really sure if there's really any kind of reason behind Jongdae's logic, but somehow he feels better about this.  
  
Everyone's stuffing themselves, loading their plates up for seconds and thirds before they start settling back down. Jongin, Tao and Sehun stay in the kitchen though, since they're bottomless pits. Yixing can't blame them; everything's delicious.  
  
A lot of it's new to him, some of it's familiar, but it's all good food. He twirls his chopsticks into his helping of Kyungsoo and Minseok's kimchi-linguini, making sure to get some clam and kimchi before holding it up for Baekhyun to have. He blinks, and Yixing smiles, nodding, holding his chopsticks closer. What else could it be?  
  
Baekhyun takes the bite, slurping the noodles that don't manage to get into his mouth, and it's somehow both cute and sexual all at once, but that's kind of just. Baekhyun. He wipes at his mouth, but misses the sauce at the corner of his mouth, so Yixing moves to get it for him, not thinking anything of it when he sucks his thumb into his own mouth.  
  
Luhan, who's been watching this exchange, finishes eating his bite of saewoojeon before leaning over around Minseok, so Yixing can see him. "So could the happy couple tell us how they fell in love, again? It's my favorite story."  
  
Yixing knows it's just Luhan trying to be obnoxious, but Baekhyun's parents are looking on curiously, and it's not like Yixing doesn't have an answer.  
  
"Well," he begins. "I think I realized it kind of later than I really should have. Baekhyun was with someone... who wasn't really right for him, and pushed him into a really dark space, and it was around then that I figured it out. Mm. Love is kind of like a habit, don’t you think? Like doing something over and over again for the other person, and being happy to do it?  
  
"I had to really take care of Baekhyun then. I had to make sure he was.. eating and sleeping, and wasn't- That he wasn't getting worse or doing anything that he'd regret later, you know? And that wasn't exactly what I was happy doing, because I had to do it because he was in a bad place. But I was happy to care for him, and worry about him, and I would start noticing little things that I've always loved about him, you know? Like how stubbornly he cares about other people, and clings to their good qualities, how he's so loud all the time, but somehow even though he's always talking, he manages to notice everything. It's usually quiet people that are perceptive right?"  
  
Everyone laughs, and beside him, Baekhyun huffs incredulously. "Is this supposed to be how you fell in love with me or a let's-drag-Baekhyun story."  
  
Yixing smiles fondly at that. "I'm not done. Where was I? Mm, right. He has so much love for people, and even when he's not feeling one hundred percent himself, he'll always do whatever it takes to make other people smile or feel more comfortable, because that's the kind of person he is. Then there's little things like when I can't sleep, he'll sometimes just come out to where I'm working or figuring music out with his comforter, and he'll just lay on me or on my work until I at least go to bed, or how his smile is never ingenuine, how he has so many moles everywhere, and how cute they are, even though he likes to cover them with makeup—I'm not even really sure if it's really a question of when I fell in love with him, since it feels like it happens everyday. I'm always learning new things about him, new things to love."  
  
Baekhyun stares at him for a moment, looking almost shell-shocked, before his expression changes, looking like an angry kind of determined. "Yeah? Well. It's not like you're any less loveable. You fucking—you were always the most unbelievable best friend. You always did something for me if I asked. Were always, _always_ there if I needed you. Never fucking asked questions, even if I had the most ridiculous requests, let me be a mess, picked me up again and again when I would run myself into the ground because I never learned from my mistakes. It's like you're my personal fucking angel, because I honestly," Baekhyun’s voice cracks then, eye flooding with tears, hot and sudden.  
  
"I don't know if I'd be here, if it wasn't for you, Yixing," he half whispers half chokes, face pressed into his shoulder.  
  
Yixing blinks, arms coming up to curl around Baekhyun's back, setting his cheek on top of his head. "Shh, hey."  
  
"Aigoo," Baekhyun's mom tuts from across the table. "This kid, acting like love is a competition, getting so caught up in his emotions he starts crying, cham."  
  
Everyone else, who had been varying levels of silent, either stunned or quietly amused, start snickering.  
  
Luhan starts laughing to the point of tears, wiping the inner corner of his eye with his thumb. "Damn, Baek, I thought Yixing was the one that was going to go full cheese on us, not you."  
  
Minseok smacks him upside the head, which shuts him up pretty quick.  
  
Baekhyun stands up then, eyes red and expression deadly. "Shut the fuck up, Luhan." Then, "I'm going to my room."  
  
It's not lost on Yixing that he goes to Yixing's room rather than his own, and he makes an apologetic face at his guests before rushing after him. Baekhyun left the door unlocked for him, even though he's facing away from the door, curled up on the bed.  
  
"Hey."  
  
Baekhyun pats at the space behind him, not moving otherwise. Yixing slips in behind him, leaving some space between them. Baekhyun just takes his arm, pulling him forward while he scoots back against his chest so he can hug his arm.  
  
“Were you—were you lying back there?” Baekhyun asks, voice small.  
  
So this is what’s happening. “No,” he responds. He’s over hiding it. Yixing can feel Baekhyun’s breath stop.  
  
“Not even the part when you said you love me?”  
  
Yixing shakes his head, pressing his nose into Baekhyun’s hair. “No, not then either.”  
  
“Me neither.”  
  
Yixing frowns a little. “What are you saying ‘me neither’ to? You just said I was loveable, you never said you loved me.”  
  
Baekhyun turns around then, eyes still wet with tears, though he’s angry now. “I just did, asshole.”  
  
Yixing blinks, wondering if he heard right. “What?”  
  
“Are you just going to stare at me or are we going to ki-” Yixing leans forward, crushing his mouth to Baekhyun’s, fingers curling into his sides. Baekhyun hums against his mouth, smiling against his bottom lip before he’s sucking it into his mouth, hands smoothing up his chest, up along the sides of his neck and into his hair.  
  
Yixing’s hands slide down, squeezing at Baekhyun’s hips, rewarded by a muffled moan. Encouraged, he slides them further back, squeezing firmly at his ass, a surprised moan slipping out of Baekhyun’s mouth, probably louder than he intended.  
  
They pull apart, realizing at the same time that they still have guests over—not even just guests—Baekhyun’s _parents_ are still in the living room. Yixing leans forward to press a kiss into the top corner of Baekhyun’s mouth, right where his mole is.  
  
“We should stop, make a reappearance. Help clean up.”  
  
Baekhyun’s nose wrinkles at that. “What happened to ‘just existing, no expectations’?”  
  
Yixing huffs a laugh against his cheek, pressing a kiss to the mole there, to the mole at his temple, crossing over to kiss at the one at his ear, down to the one at his neck, the one between his collarbones, picking up his hand to kiss the one at his thumb before he looks up, the fond smile he finds there just asking for one more kiss.  
  
“We’re not jellyfish, Baekhyun,” he says finally, thumb catching at Baekhyun’s hip, rubbing gentle circles into it.  
  
Baekhyun reaches up then, tracing over his cheek. “After we get everyone to leave, after my mom and dad go, do we get to be?”  
  
Yixing kisses at his knuckles. “We’ll be whatever you want.”

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> there is an epilogue ! check the 'next in series' button !
> 
> ps: baekhyun is a giant mess, no i don't actually discriminate against ahi or he'e or even any of the names of charcuterie meats, also i don't hate taehyung, baekhyun just. needed a bad ex.
> 
> if you want to come yell at me, say hi, show support or are just curious, links to cc and twt, etc are on my [carrd](https://pricklyteeth.carrd.co/)! im friendly i promise


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